Nothing stays the same. To Jessie it seemed everyone was passing her by and she was somehow standing still. This first month of 1923 especially, when three of her best friends married, must have been an emotional roller coaster for her. It wasn’t all bad though.
New Year’s Eve 1922, Jessie had dinner at the Gayoso Hotel with her good friend Jimmie Sloan. Then she returned home for a late date with Dr. Percy Perkins. She had been out with him a few times in the last five years, most notably to the recent debutante ball in November. On New Year’s Day 1923 Jessie also had dates with Percy, first to a round of eggnog parties and then to the New Year’s Cabaret Dinner Dance at the Gayoso.
Then the next day, Tuesday, January 2, 1923: Never have I had such a shock as I did this morning. A letter from Dorothy Sanford telling me she was in Dallas buying her wedding clothes. Marries Buddie Erwin tomorrow. Decided all of a sudden. Had told no one but her mother and father. The little monkey. Made me feel real sad to know she was leaving me all alone, but I know she’ll be happy. She wired me last week to please come visit her. Wonder if she would have decided to marry had I gone. Dot Haverty’s wedding invitation came this morning too, so I went to town and got a present for both of them.
Two weeks later Jessie wrote in her diary, Wednesday, January 17, 1923: Had to bid farewell to one of the best friends I ever had in my life to-day, for he took unto himself a wife. He has given me more pleasure [than] most any one for nine years now. And I hope they’ll always be happy. Went to Miriam Fleming and F.D. Gardner’s wedding at Calvary Church this afternoon. It was lovely. F.D. had been Jessie’s best friend for so many years, always so supportive and generous. She would miss F.D.
On the left, Miriam and Virginia Fleming (I am not sure which girl is which) with their mother between them. On the right Jessie and 2nd from right is (I think) F.D. Gardner. Taken during a trip to the gulf coast in 1920.
The next day, January 18, 1923, her good friend Dot Haverty married. Another good friend deserted me today. Dorothy Haverty married Dr. Lon Grove in Atlanta tonight. They are going to tour the West Indies, stop by Florida on the way back.
Dot Haverty’s engagement announcement
Meanwhile, Jessie is still trying to figure out Dr. Percy Perkins. On January 8th she wrote, Percy and I had quite a talk when we got home. I like him, though sometimes I wonder if he is conceited. Still I don’t think he meant to be bragging tonight when he said he never had asked a girl to marry him. I like to be with him and I guess I don’t know just what I think of him yet.
For a while Jessie called him Mr. Gardner. Then she called him Douglas. After they had known each other for some months and had become good friends he asked Jessie to call him F.D., so she did. I wish I had a picture of Francis Douglas Gardner for I would post it right here. My grandmother Jessie never once described his looks, only his acts and the ways in which he was such a loyal and generous friend to her, a gentleman in every way.
Francis Douglas Gardner (F.D.) came from a wealthy family in Liverpool, England. His family’s timber trade company, Joseph Gardner & Sons, had been operating since at least the middle of the 18th century. F.D. was in Memphis working in the timber business along the Mississippi River and often traveled to New Orleans or New York on business.
Alligator purse from Florida given to Jessie by F.D. Gardner, June 28, 1917.
Jessie’s first date with F.D. was on May 22, 1916, and she wrote in her diary, “Had an engagement with Mr. Douglas Gardner to-night – direct from England and he is certainly a typical Englishman. I dearly love to hear him talk. He is very deliberate in his manner…. I think Mr. Gardner’s hobby is finding misspelt words. He showed me at least a dozen to-night – those signs in curios shops. He is a walker alright. We had such an interesting talk after we got home.” They continued to go out once or twice a month, and as they got to know one another and became closer friends, they went out more frequently.
Bar pin with diamond given to Jessie on her 23rd birthday by F.D. Gardner, December 18, 1917.
F.D. was a little bit of a ladies’ man, according to Jessie. He had a group of girls/women in Memphis that he took out regularly, gave parties for their birthdays, and bought them gifts and flowers. On June 15, 1917, Jessie wrote in her diary, “Had an engagement for lunch to-day with Douglas Gardner. We had lunch at the Gayoso and had quite an interesting time. He told me tales of Borneo. He leaves to-morrow for Florida. How ‘the girls’ will miss him.”
A gauze and carved ivory fan given to Jessie by F.D. Gardner, June 15, 1918.
The birthday parties he gave for Jessie and his other friends were lavish affairs with dinner for 12 or more at the Gayoso Hotel, the Country Club, or the Peabody. F.D. was also an accomplished and trained artist, and the place cards at his dinner parties were portraits of the guests (drawn by F.D. himself) in some fanciful setting, and included a bit of original prose or poetry. Every woman had a different corsage at their place, and the delicious dinner was a multi-course affair. After dinner and perhaps some dancing (live bands often played at the hotels), all the guests would drive out to someone’s home for games and wonderful prizes for everyone from F.D.. As Jessie said after her birthday, “It was all like a storybook party.”
Place card art by F.D. Gardner, 1919.Place card art by F.D. Gardner, 1919.
Jessie often remarked how she’d never known anyone like F.D., that he was one of a kind, and that he was a wonderful friend. He was incredibly generous to Jessie and his friends. He almost always sent a corsage of beautiful flowers to Jessie if they had a date, and after a while every date ended with F.D. buying Jessie two boxes of candies (or rather, one box of chocolates and one box of salted almonds). After they had known one another for about a year, he began giving her very nice gifts from time to time. Sometimes Jessie would tell him that he shouldn’t give her so much, but he always said it made him happy to give gifts. When Bud died, F.D. was working in New Orleans, but he sent flowers to Jessie’s home every day. And whenever he came home to Memphis from a trip to New York or Liverpool or New Orleans, he came loaded down with presents for Jessie.
I believe this is a cairngorm pin from Scotland given to Jessie by F.D. Gardner on October 1, 1919. *If there is a jewelry expert reading who disagrees, let me know.
Not only was F.D. a sophisticated international traveler and businessman, an elegant gentleman from Liverpool, an artist and a poet, he was also an accomplished tennis player and an amateur golfer with club titles to his name. But most of all he was one of Jessie’s closest friends. I know that F.D. died in 1959 and was buried at Elmwood Cemetery in Memphis, so I hope that he and my grandmother Jessie remained friends throughout his life.
Place card art by F.D. Gardner, 1920.Place card art by F.D. Gardner, 1921.
This is the drawing that no one wanted to hang in their house, including my husband. So it hangs in my laundry room. And NO I don’t believe my grandmother Jessie actually wore such a costume. Art by F.D. Gardner, date unknown.
A final interesting note: Francis Douglas Gardner (F.D.) had an older brother, Gerald Brosseau Gardner, who is known internationally in pagan and occult communities as the “Father of Wicca.”
